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« Honorary Mother (it was a Crafting Emergency) | Main | PSA for parents of pre-teens and teens - my personal experience »



You will all be in my thoughts and prayers! Big hugs!


I feel so bad for John. I am in very much his shoes healthwise and I think as a younger person especially a boy it is soooo freaking overwhelming and scary. It sucks to literally wake up and face your mortality daily. It sucks to know that this is your life forever....lots of infusions, hospital stays etc.

The bright spot for me is my family and child but I think as a younger person you can't see that forest for the trees.

I think he is acting out drug wise for a few is probably in more pain physically than you could realize. I know I am the major downplayer of everything and I think a guy would too, two I think he is just looking for an escape...something to make him forget about it all for a while and three it is something that makes him feel normal and last but not least I think it is a control is hard knowing that your body is betraying you and you AREN'T in control...I think he feels like that is something he CAN control. Does that make sense.

I have suffered with depression and anxiety and have been in some very dark places myself. I am here if you need insight...I know it is different because he is a male but I can tell you what helped me.

You are all going to be in my prayers. I just pray that John can come to the same peace with things I have. I think you almost go through a grieving process....of a normal life...sounds like he is just in the denial/anger phase.

Lots of hugs and prayers.



Thank you for sharing. I, too am in the trenches, except mine is 18 and so he claims that he is an "adult" and does not need to ask permission anymore, follow our rules even though he is living in our house, and he is so angry I just don't understand why. Each and every day there is drama revolving around my youngest child and I am so worried about him. I love him dearly but a part of my dreams of the day he will move out onto his own so that we will not have these daily battles and life will somehow be somewhat calm so that my blood pressure will go back to a healthy level and I will stop getting stress migraines. How can you help a child that does not want your help. I take courage from blog and the fact that I am not alone. Thanks again for sharing.


Keep hanging in there. You will continue to get through this trying time.

Amy So

During one of my roughest teenage times, I literally kicked a hole in my bedroom wall. I still remember the absolutely trapped anger I a caged lion with nothing to pounce on, and if I didn't get that anger out of me something in ME would have been like that wall.

Which is my way of saying: I still know he will eventually work it out. He will have consequences that linger, but it will all straighten out in the end. BIG HUGS to you!


I think of you often and am sending you lots and lots of (((HUGS)))


Just as I was sitting here thinking about my own parenting shortcomings, I ran across one of your posts and clicked on your blog. I think I need to get walking, too. Parenting my teenager is the hardest thing I've ever done, it affects everything that I do, and it is sucking the life out of me. I have gray hairs too.

So, next time you go for a walk, know that I will be walking too, and that it will be because of you. And next time you have a moment of darkness, think about the light that you're shedding on the lives of others. God does work in mysterious ways.



Good Luck with your son. I don't usually comment on blogs, but I do read yours frequently and felt compelled to tell you how great of a mom you are! You have so much kindness and patience with your children as they go through the ups and downs of life. I have a 14 year old daughter and I only hope I can be 1/2 the mother and friend you are to your kids! My prayers are with you and your family during this tough time. I am sure everything will work out for the best in time.

Hugs to you!
Sara Onsen
Coal City, Illinois


Kelly, my heart and prayers go out to you. I'm glad you see that God is working in your life through other people. I agree with the other posters that walking will do wonders. If you walk alone, consider listening to some inspirational podcasts or some praise/worship music too. This shoul help calm you down and give you strength for what lies ahead.

You are an excellent and devoted mother. Do not doubt yourself. As parents, we do the best we can. I am a mother of three teenage sons and it is not easy. We have to remember they are individuals and often strong-willed. Just as God, our Father, watches us, his children, make poor choices at times, we continue to love our children. You know that. Sometimes we need that reminder to not be so hard on ourselves as parents.


My prayers are with you Kelly.


{{{Kelly}}}. "just keep walking, just keep walking".

You are in my prayers that things will turn around for you and your family.

Can you believe our girls will be done with their first year of college? Liz will be home on the 30th! Time flies.........

Carla S.

Kelly, sending lots of hugs to you and your sweet son. I have seen some similar tough times in my own family (though I am not a parent myself and can only imagine how tough it must be, and your situation is magnified by so many extenuating circumstances). Just know that I am thinking of you all.


My prayers are with you all...

Becky RT

Keep walking Kelly. God works in mysterious ways. You are in a heartbreaking situation. Just keep walking...


kelly, i would also remind you of how difficult last year was with Alyssa. you survived her senior year and have seen a complete turnaround with her. unfortunately, john has the added burden of his health issues. embrace the smiles and good times. he'll come around too. we want to think that 17 and 18 yo's are ready to be adults. they want to be, but their brains are still developing. it's a tough time for the kids and the parents.

you are lucky that jeff wants to walk with you. i find myself in his position trying to get my dh to walk with me. i think it is a great way to connect with one another, away from the tv and other household activities.

big hugs to you!!


HUGE HUGS and P&PT heading your way. All you can do is be there to guide John. Unfortunately he's got to make lots of hard decisions for himself at the moment.

And what do you mean scrapbooking isn't exercising? You mean those arm movements of reaching for adhesive or embellishments don't count? LOL! I guess that's why my butt is getting bigger. *sigh*


Kelly -- sending you many hugs and prayers for all of what's going on. I know it has to be so hard to deal with what all John's doing/experiencing. I can't tell you how many times I almost texted you this week . . . . I was worried that the surgery hadn't gone well and that you needed your rest! From now on, when I have the urge to text Kelly, I'm gonna do it!

I had to laugh about the tripping. . . oh, we're so alike! We were walking down a sidewalk last week and I hit the place in the path where there had been some major settling. I stumbled, and I hurt so bad I thought I broke my ankle! It's better now, but still sore. So now every time I feel that soreness, I'll be thinking of you.

Sending you many, many hugs.

Becky B.

You keep on standing. I think you are just absolutely amazing.

I really need to walk. I think I might even be inspired to start now.

You know I love you and care about you. Your whole family continues to be in my prayers.


Hugs to you Kelly. Sometimes parenting is the best thing in the world and sometimes it is the worst. I am glad your health is better.


once again you have written a post that hits home for me. i am back to walking outside and have found it grounds me in a way the treadmill never could. i have a walking partner who keeps me going and when she is not available, it is tough for me to 'keep the pace'. you have been through so much and it never seems that light is getting any closer, the tunnel just keeps getting longer. but you persevere. and i cheer you on. sending you love, hugs and so much more....aching legs, blisters and a clearer head - walking will do that for you.

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