Dorm Room Drama

Sad news from Alyssa: one of her roommates, Stephanie, attempted to commit suicide last Wednesday evening. She was taken away from the dorm by an ambulance while Alyssa was attending her night class. Alyssa knew that Steph was "threatening" to do something bad, but what she did not know was that when Stephanie made the threat she had already taken 70+ ibuprofen. Steph's mom arrived from Ohio at midnight on Wednesday while Steph was still in the hospital. I can't begin to imagine how terrifying that mother's drive must have been.

And now there is a lot of bad drama going on amongst the other roommates - they are mad at Alyssa for not leaving her night class and for not skipping sorority activities during all the excitement - and after telling Alyssa that she was heartless and that she needed "therapy", those two girls left campus to stay at Halie's house for the weekend, leaving Alyssa alone in the dorm for three days. Alyssa is so angry with them for making such a stink about "her" when what they should be concerned about is Stephanie's well-being.

As it stands, Stephanie was in the hospital for 3 days under psych observation. The school wanted her to be moved to a psych clinic for at least another week, but when she was released from the hospital, her mom took her home to Ohio. It doesn't sound like she will be allowed to return to the dorms, but whether she is kicked out of school is still up for debate. The RA has been in meetings with the faculty to discuss the options, and Steph's family is scheduled to meet with the Dean tomorrow. The school requested that Alyssa attend a mandatory counselling session this week to give her "official" report as to what happened on Wednesday. She also has to meet with the Dean to discuss the options and to share her thoughts on what happened. Needless to say, my daughter is not happy about being put in this situation.

All in all, a HUGE mess. Alyssa is plugging along with her classes as best as she can considering the circumstances, but she is pretty shook up. Sidenote: this is the same roommate who had to be transported by an ambulance last semester due to binge drinking and alcohol poisoning... so she was already on probation, which [I hope] will factor in to the decision of her being allowed to stay in school. I swear to all that is holy - Alyssa is a magnet to weird friends. She is always getting put in these odd situations. I almost wish she'd find a boyfriend so that she would not get so involved in the girl drama. Okay... not really... I don't want her to find a boyfriend... not yet, anyway.

In addition to being worried about Stephanie (whom I've met on four occasions), I feel terribly for my daughter. She is just beside herself with anxiety and frustration. And those ding-dongs who she lives with think that Steph will be back in school and living in the dorm by Wednesday. What the heck? They actually think the university will allow Stephanie to return after two major incidents? Give me a break. These girls are in la-la land.  However, in the event that the university does allow Stephanie to move back into the dorm room, Alyssa has requested a room change. The RA told her that the request will be moved to the top of the priority list if the situation deems it necessary. The problem with this scenario is that Alyssa really doesn't want to move. She is settled into the room she is currently living in, and although she is fighting with the other roommates, she is comfortable with the living arrangements.

 

On the bright side - Alyssa was officially initiated into the Chi Omega Sorority on Friday, and after three days of non-stop events, she is exhausted but thrilled. The weekend began Friday morning at 6:00 with a sunrise ceremony and from there it was full speed ahead with three days of initiation ceremonies and activities.  Apparently she received her "letters" on Friday morning - I guess those are like high school varsity letters (?). Whatever they were, they made her happy. She asked me to think about how to incorporate them into a quilt - and as we all know, I am all over that idea. I've already begun sketching out ideas for her to consider.

As I was trying to help Alyssa handle this crisis (via text messages and phone calls), I was once again reminded why being a teenager is so very difficult. These kids have pressure from all sides. I told Alyssa that this experience will make her stronger and will build character... and with those words, I thought I sounded like my mother! That is what I've become... my mother. Thankfully, my mom is a saint and if I come even a tiny bit close to offering the love and support to my children that she has offered me - I will have done my job.

Girl drama. I hate it... I hated it when Alyssa was living at home, and I hate it even more now - because the truth of the matter is that the older the girls are, the bigger the drama becomes.

Comments

[may flaum]

I can't imagine why Alyssa would cancel what she was doing/why roomies would be mad. it's not like they would have let the girls see her or visit!

I do hope this all gets sorted out and that this troubled girl gets the hope she SO needs

[Linda Hofacker]

I so agree - My daughter is a junior at ONU and is going to move into an apartment next year with 2 friends that have the same type of ideas of how to cohabitate! Her current room mate is a doll but just doesn't have a clue about real life!

Hugs to you and your daughter - hope all turns out well.

[Heather]

Oh UGH! She's certainly had more than her fair share of girl drama. I hate it when they pull in people to get their side of the story. The good news is she's not being "summoned" to the girls' parents Embassy Suite room to have a big old meeting with about 6-8 other people! tehehe . . .do I sound like I'm speaking from experience???

Hugs to you guys. . .

[pcsmart]

i too had roommate dramas in college....and being an only child, i was clueless. this girl is troubled and i am sure the university does not want to be responsible for her anymore. alyssa has her head in the right place, hopefully the sorority will be a just the thing she needs....

[becky]

How horrible that the poor girl felt the need to attempt suicide. I'm so sorry that Alyssa is having to deal with all of it. Congratulations to her on the sorority.

[Marla]

Congrats to Alyssa on the sorority :-) That's great.

I feel so badly that she is having to deal with all this drama. I hope everything turns out ok with the roommate situation for her.

[Donna]

I am so sorry Alyssa had to go through all of this and of course am very concerned for her roommate. I hope the roommate gets the help she needs. I'm with you on the girl drama and am so not looking forward to it. So far sixth grade drama isn't anywhere near whatAlyssa has to deal with. Here's hoping that Alyssa can deal with what is going on (I'm sure her new sisters will help) and she can get back on track for the rest of the semester. Hugs to you both.

[Amanda]

In answer to the sorority question. You can't wear the letters unless you're a member so it's a huge deal. It means she's officially part of the group.

I just hope that helps take her mind off of some of the other things going on.

[Sudie Alexander]

Big hugs to Alyssa. that is some very serious stuff for her. and hugs to you, too.

Prayers for Stephanie and her family.

Congrats on making Chi O! that is so exciting.

[Barb]

Oh Kel, I'm so sorry. And you're right. I learned a hard lesson in grown-up girl drama two years ago, when I was the victim. big hugs to you and Alyssa. Big congrats on her XO initiation too, that's exciting!

[Kim]

I'm so sorry and sad for Alyssa and that she has to deal with this DRAMA. I will keep her in my thoughts and prayers.

Liz joined a sorority too---Phi Mu. She loves it. We are "sorority moms"!!! I cannot wait to see what quilt you make.

[slammie]

HUGS to Alyssa for having to go thru this and P&PT to her roommate. No comment about the remaining ones though.

Can't wait to see what you come up with for the quilt. Congrats on being a XO (can't do Greek symbols, sorry).